I'm not gonna take the time right now to write a new post, so for today (okay, for this month...) I'm just reposting an old one that brings me smiles every time I look at it:



http://robferrinfamily.blogspot.com/2008/12/arizona-christmas.html

Tonight I'm reminded of a simple (and all-too-rare) occurrence that brings me joy: Putting clean children to bed on clean sheets. I wish it could happen every night!!! Oh, I could just lay right next to them for hours, smelling their scrumptious, soft hair, and then smelling their fresh sheets--alternating back and forth til I fell asleep.

For a brief moment I feel like everything is clean and that I'm a really good mom. (And then I walk out into the rest of the house...) =)

I know I'm a big goofball, but it really doesn't take much to bring a smile to my face. And sometimes I just have to share!

To My Sweet Friends (but not to imply that my other friends aren't sweet...) ;-)

Ok, so I just decided to share a reflective moment of humor a few days ago, and suddenly THE TROOPS have come out to save me from my perceived self-deprecation. Oh you guys... I don't even know what to do with all these comments! You are all so sweet to try to make me feel better. I really was just trying to share some humor about myself--and possibly make anyone reading it feel better (since that's what I'm here for). =) I really should email all of you individually...

Anyway, you guys really are great friends.

Jessica, anyone who can handle having 6 children under age 8 HAS IT TOGETHER! I honestly can't even imagine...

And Wendy... you've always seemed to have a "what really matters" perspective on things--you teach me something valuable every time I'm around you. Thank you for the reminders. =)

Shari... I've figured out YOUR life's mission: You must have signed up to be my cheerleader. You always make me sound much better than reality! I'm so glad to be in a family who knows me so well and loves me anyway. Please don't tell people how much I pay you. =) Seriously, though, you're so great at giving others a boost when they need it! Thanks for being such a great sis-in-law!!!

Crissie, you're so sweet, and I'm glad the story went over well. =)

Crystal, you have a newborn, for crying out loud!!! (I really didn't do that on purpose--but I'm leaving it now, since it fits so well... although your little one is so sweet, she probably never cries.) Anyway, your home is supposed to be upside-down when you have a new little one! I don't know what mack truck you were talking about--your home looked like a perfect place for a family to be comfortable and happy. I should tell you that I feel the Spirit every time I'm in your home. I really do. I'm glad you felt loved and cared for--because you are!!!

And Melody... I truly miss our Primary days. You guys were always so patient with me! Thanks for overlooking so much and teaching me more than I could ever put into words. I love your quiet, humble, yet so capable way! I really miss you!!! =(

I have the greatest friends and family!!!!!!! But please don't think you have to tell me I'm wonderful every time I feel the need for some honest reflection. It will wear you out!!! ;-)

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!

Passing Along the Joy

Just thought I'd pass along a couple of good book suggestions. Awhile back I read these books to my kiddos, and we had some really great times in the process. Over the summer we read Goodnight Mister Tom, by Michelle Magorian, and before that we finished The Miracle of Miss Willie, by Alma J. Yates. My goal is to always be in the middle of a good book with them--but I fall far short of that. I don't know why I don't make it happen every night, since I love it so much! These moments are what mommyhood is all about!
Anyway, these books are SO GREAT--we laughed, cried, and had lots of discussion on topics that never would have come up otherwise. The reason these two books were especially good were that my older kids liked them. The younger ones are always up for a story, but the older ones often have homework or other activities going on, and have to be "persuaded" (and yes, sometimes forced) to sit down and listen. My kids know that one of my rules is that "you're never too old to be read to."
As is often the case, the first few times we opened these books the older kids grumbled and said they didn't have time. I have to admit that even I questioned myself a couple of times as I made them join us, knowing they really did have homework that was going to keep them up late. Sometimes I just told them to work on their homework while I read. I was only asking for 10 or 15 minutes--and I knew it could possibly be the most worthwhile few minutes of their day.
We didn't have to get too far into either book before we began to see some changes in attitude. The kids were gathering faster than they had at first. We had comments like, "Don't read Miss Willie while I'm gone!" as they headed out the door to mutual. And my favorite was one night when we started reading Mr. Tom and Ashlee popped her head up (from her pillow) and said, "What's going on?!?" (She had fallen asleep during the story the night before.) The other kids started filling her in on what she had missed. They were all trying to talk at once, and Ashlee was just as caught up in listening to them as I've ever seen her watching American Idol. By the time they finished telling her about what she had missed she was sitting up, ready for the next chapter. Actually, my ultimate favorite attitude change was the one that happened in Rob. He's always been a TV kind of guy--(why spend days or weeks reading a book when you can watch the movie in 2 hours?) But after overhearing us a few times he actually started joining us, especially toward the ends of the books--and even doing the reading some nights!
There's nothing quite like the excitement of a good book--and reading as a family just makes it 100x better! I can't wait to find our next good read! Any suggestions???
Oh, one more I just thought about: That Quail, Robert, by Margaret Stanger, is a really great book for all ages too. Especially for animal lovers! Your kids will start begging you for a "Robert."
Goodnight Mr. Tom has some hard issues in it, so if you're concerned you can pre-read it before reading it with your kids. And FYI--you'll need tissues for these ones...

My Life's Mission

Someday I'll write another post that includes pictures. But not today. =)

This title might have led you to believe that this would possibly be a deep and uplifting post. If that's what you're hoping for, you might want to look at someone else's blog this time--I'm in more of a silly mood today. =) My thoughts are real, and I mean what I'm going to say, but there's a lot of humor to be found in all of this as well.

I discovered my life's mission years ago. At first I wasn't too thrilled about it, because it required me to go through many, many humbling moments. But once I came to grips with it I decided I could and should go ahead and embrace it. Some of my friends have already heard me say it, so I'm going ahead and sharing it publicly:

I was put on this earth to make other people feel better.

It's true, and I've proven it time and time again.

If your house is a mess, come over to mine. You'll leave feeling better. Guaranteed.

If your child's hair hasn't been combed yet today, I can top your story.

If you arrive late to a function, you can count on me to be just a few minutes behind you.

If you made a stupid comment that is horribly embarrassing to think about, give me a couple hours of your time and I'll share a few of mine with you. Maybe I'll just go ahead and post them sometime, for the whole world to enjoy....? =)

I could go on and on with examples, but what it comes down to is:

I'm perpetually a day late and a dollar short.

per·pet·u·al (pr-pch-l)

adj.

1. Lasting for eternity.

2. Continuing or lasting for an indefinitely long time.

(Just decided to throw a quick definition in) =)

I've worked my whole life to try to dig my way out of being the way I am. I've read books, I've devised new strategies, I've prayed, I've tried to try harder. Sometimes I can "get it together" for a day or two--even up to a week!--but sooner or later I'm back to the same old me.

But just this morning a friend called me and said she just needed to talk to me because I always make her feel better. She said she can always relate to me. And I was reminded about my life's mission, and the fact that, in all my moments of embarrassment and even deep humiliation, I've had opportunities to make others feel better. I really think that I'm one person no one has to feel intimidated by. And maybe in all my struggles there's a hidden gift underneath it all, that has given me the ability to relate to the things others are dealing with. I have no room to ever judge other people who can't seem to "get it together." And I hope that they feel that, and know that I understand.

So for today I'm reminded that I need to embrace what I've been given, and to view it from a different angle. For me, life will probably never consist of looking my best, being organized, saying all the right things in just the right ways, and inspiring others to want to be like me. Instead it will be a series of opportunities to show others that life is about continuing to try, and that a perpetual ;-) sinkful of dishes doesn't mean you can't still have fun.

So the next time you need to feel better, give me a call. I'll have a story ready for you! =)

Murmur, Murmur, Murmur

A couple weeks ago we were gathering at the table for dinner one night, and as the kids sat down, one by one, the comments started: "What is this?" "Why does it look like that?" "I like it with more sauce." "Why didn't you keep the noodles separate?" I don't know if everyone was lacking sleep or what, but the grumbling was unbelievable!

Just as a rude comment was developing in my mind, Chase said, "Well, it's better than nothing!"

The laughter got us all through the moment, and--miracle of miracles--everyone even survived eating the sub-par meal!!! In fact, by the end a couple of them even called it "yummy."

Thank goodness for five-year-olds to bring us all back to reality and help us remember how much everyday life requires a sense of humor.

;-)

Just have to post a conversation that took place in the car the other day:

Kaybree (in a sad tone): Mom, are we REALLY not going to have any more babies?

Me: Yeah, I'm pretty sure we're not having any more babies.

Emmalee: Oh, that's so sad.

Chase (in a very serious tone): Mom, ALL I've EVER wanted was a baby, or a Webkinz.



(Maybe it's just me, but one of those choices sounds much easier than the other!) ;-)

I Know I Don't Belong

Since the whole point of this post is to state some ways in which I don't relate to others very well, I don't expect that many people will see things the way I do. But it's part of who I am, so I'm going to post my thoughts while they're on my mind.
I've spent a good portion of my life feeling like I don't belong. But it's especially evident to me in certain situations. The example I'll use to illustrate is a baby shower, since I'm usually uncomfortable and "out of place" when I attend one.
Of course I can usually find someone to chat with, but the main conversations I'm overhearing are about all the adorable baby clothes, how to make the cutest hair ribbons, how boys aren't as fun to buy for as girls, epidurals, doctors, what the greatest new bottles are, what color/theme the nursery is or is going to be, etc...
I know all those things are fun and interesting to talk about, and I've had my share of these conversations. But I can't shut off the "deep thinking" part of me that wants so badly to sit down with the new-mom-to-be and talk about the amazing adventure she's about to embark on. I want her to know that she is about to be given the greatest privilege and responsibility that can ever be given a woman; that this new life is not just a plaything to dress up in cute frills and bows, it's a person whose very character will be shaped and molded by her daily decisions. I want to tell her to cuddle this sweet baby as much as she possibly can, that he's going to grow up faster than she can imagine. I want to tell her what a difference it makes to breastfeed, and to keep it going as long as she can. I want to tell her to have a library for this little one, to read to him everyday, and not to rush through the process--to stay on his favorite page and talk about it for 5 minutes if that's what he wants to do. I want to tell her not to overschedule him, to let him be a child and play like children should. He doesn't need to be in a bunch of structured activities; build a sandpile in the back yard for him and let him do what little boys do. Let him wear inexpensive clothes so you're not tempted to tell him not to get dirty; little boys (and girls) were meant to get dirty. Play marbles with him, play dolls with her. Make play dough. Most of all, I want to make sure she knows that she is the one who has been chosen by God to be this baby's mother--now and into eternity. I want to tell her not to be tempted to send this baby here and there while she enjoys some "me time." Teaching moments aren't often planned--they happen as parents spend time with their children; don't be deceived into thinking that "quality" time can replace quantity. I want to tell her something that President Benson said to mothers: "Mothers, you are your children's best teacher. Don't shift this precious responsibility to day-care centers or babysitters. A mother's love and prayerful concern for her children are her most important ingredients in teaching her own."

Now, I don't believe that dressing children in cute clothes or making hair bows are bad things to do--we all have fun with those kinds of things. But a mother who is constantly running to clothing sales and new boutiques, worrying that her baby's wardrobe is outdated or that the nursery needs a new paint color, may have lost her focus on what is truly important. When this life is over, ALL of us will be outdated, and we'll all come to the reality that we either focused on what was important or we didn't. Period.

Well, this is a small glimpse into the workings of my brain. Yes, it's terrifying. ;-) But the fact is, I've lived long enough to realize how quickly life really goes by, and how critical it is that we learn, early-on, what matters. And, knowing that, I can't spend a lot of time thinking about "fufu" stuff. I'm constantly analyzing life, sorting out the portions that are of an eternal nature, and trying my best to toss the rest aside. Sometimes I decide I'm too obsessive, but other times I'm reminded of Conference talks where words like "diligence," "perseverance," or "steadfast and immovable" are used, and I decide that maybe diligence in keeping an eternal perspective requires just a bit of OCD. =)

Sometimes it's not just at baby showers that I feel I don't belong. Sometimes it's just in this world in general. I thought I was the only person who ever felt that way, until I heard someone call those feelings, "Heavenly Homesickness." Tears came to my eyes as I realized that other people also had feelings of "not belonging" in this world. Sometimes I really do get homesick to return to my Heavenly Father, to be in a place where everything is important and no "fufu" exists; where everyone is in the business of teaching, of saving souls, of loving and improving.

I know right now I don't belong, but I also have faith that someday I will.

Happy Birthday, Honey!!!

Well, my main man is a whoppin' 38 years old today!!! So it's time to take a moment and reflect on all the things I love about him. I'm sure I could think of hundreds, but I'll go for my 38 favorites (in no particular order):

1.) He's a great listener.
2.) He's a wonderful husband--he always has my needs and wishes in mind.
3.) He's an amazing father, always finding new and creative ways to approach raising our family.
4.) He provides for us and is committed to keeping me home with our kids.
5.) He can get straight to the point, yet has a sensitive side.
6.) He has wisdom far beyond his years.
7.) He is very practical.
8.) He thinks things through.
9.) He's patient--especially with me!
10.) He keeps our family up-to-date. (If it weren't for him, we'd still be using my computer from college... Internet??? What's Internet???) =)
11.) He's a hard, fast worker.
12.) He's smart--can figure out anything.
13.) He's a great handyman--can fix/install/redo everything around the house.
14.) He's as loyal as a puppydog (and has the puppydog eyes to go with it)!
15.) He's strong--in every way.
16.) He has super-sexy arms & legs--so muscular & defined! It's that tennis player in him! ;-)
17.) He's a worthy Priesthood holder (wow--I just went from "sexy" to my eyes tearing up...)
18.) He knows just what to say when I need advice.
19.) He's a unique combination of shy and intimidating.
20.) He makes me laugh every day.
21.) He's opposite of me in all the right ways.
22.) He loves me unconditionally, in spite of my shortcomings.
23.) He's the perfect man for me!!!

From the kids:

24.) He cares about us. (Emmee)
25.) He's funny. (Kaybree)
26.) He has good discipline. (Spencer)
27.) He doesn't cry. (Ashlee)
28.) He teaches us how to work hard. (Blake)
29.) He wrestles with me. (Chase)
30.) He always knows what to do. (Spencer)
31.) He's really nice. (Emmee)
32.) He loves spending time with our family. (Blake)
33.) He makes us strong. (Kaybree--thinking of arm circles... I'll have to post about that sometime) =)
34.) It's hard to get him to change his mind. (Spencer)
35.) He loves us. (Emmee)
36.) He watches kid shows with us. (Kaybree)
37.) He always makes everything fun. (Blake)
38.) On the couch he lays with me. (Chase)

This was our morning. We had french toast, made by Emmee, then gave Dad his gifts:






Chase's gift was a drawing, folded carefully and put into a "Cars" gift bag.
















Emmee's card got a smile out of him too.
















After he finished opening gifts it seems he & Blake decided his birthday just wouldn't be complete without... wrestling???

(In case you're wondering, Blake still had his jammers on from his morning swim practice.)

After pinning Blake quickly, he must have felt a bit bad. It was time for a brief teaching moment.

But, sadly, the results were the same... We'll give Blake a few years and see if anything changes. ;-) Or maybe Blake was just being nice to his old man, since it was his birthday and all... =)

Happy Birthday, Honey! We love you!!!

Tired Boys Don't Make Trouble

I've been told that Rob's dad's motto while they raised their family was, "Tired boys don't make trouble." He took his sons to work with him (doing A/C) from the time they were about 11 years old, and apparently wearing them out that way was a pretty good approach!
Well, Blake and Spencer have gone to work with Rob several times recently, and they're learning what it feels like to hang out on a hot roof when it's 115 degrees outside, or to spend a few hours in an attic where the air doesn't circulate and the temperature can reach 130+. When they come home from a day with Dad, they have a much greater appreciation for a lot of things! (But I have to add, they still want to go again whenever he asks, which says a lot about how much they enjoy being with him!!!)
Blake has also recently started swimming as a Freshman. (Go, QCHS!) He has practice 6 days a week and gets some pretty good workouts. He's not one to usually nap, unless it's by force--so when I caught him dozing this afternoon I had to grab the camera. Looks like we're on the path to carrying on the tradition of Grandpa's motto--whether through work or through sports, we'll wear these boys out!

Poor, Deprived Child

A couple nights ago Chase was in the car with me and he asked, "Mom, is Disneyland a real place?" (He actually has been there--he may have been 2 years old, but he's been there!) Anyway, I told him that yes, it is a real place and that sometime we'll take him there. Then he said, "Or we could go to Skateland." (He got to go there once, and apparently in his mind there's little difference between the two!) Then he said, "I think that's the only LAND I've been to!" =)

Cracked me up!!!

Well, there are definitely worse things than a 5 year old never having been to Disneyland, but I'm thinking when the money tree grows in the backyard maybe we'll head to California. He'd probably decide then that there's a difference between Disneyland and Skateland. =)

It's a PAC Night!

Cub Scout Pack Night? Nope--no cub scouts in this family for awhile. Heading to the Performing Arts Center??? No, not that either. This P-A-C stands for Pick A Can!!! This is what I resort to when life gets overwhelming, or in this case, when half the family is away and my choice is clearly NOT to fix dinner. We all head to the pantry and the kids know anything goes (well, within reason...)!
Hormel Chili is a common choice. Fruit is also popular, although not exactly a "dinner." Often two kids will collaborate and each take half a can of fruit and half a can of chili... or whatever...
Easy prep. Easy clean-up. Ecstatic children, because they don't get these "luxuries" very often. And a happy mama who enjoys the break.
Just passing along a little survival tip! =)

Oh, What Do You Do in the Summertime?

So, have you ever played air hockey with pretzels and salt shakers? Me neither... but when it's hot outside and kids start looking for things to do indoors, they can get quite creative! =)


We also played Twister today, in spite of the fact that [Chase informed us], "our spinner thing that goes 'Bhoonk' went 'Dhoonk'!" With the help of hand signals (the "Bhoonk" being the flipping of the spinner and the "Dhoonk" being the spinner falling off), we understood this to mean that our spinner was broken. =) So, again, creativity came into action. Blake hopped online and found a virtual spinner! (Oh, the amazing Internet!) If that hadn't worked, we also had a plan for using dice.



While we were playing Twister, Chase was of course our additional entertainment. Several times as the directions were called out, he would realize the difficulty of the move he was gonna have to make and declare, "You're killin' me, Smalls!"


He and Spencer were the last two going for quite awhile. At one point he commented on the new position they were in, "We're like lilyfrogs!" Somehow he must have had frogs and lilypads in mind... and he knew they went together...??? =)

The boys also built a fort (and we all know a summer is just not complete without a fort!) They were kind enough to let the girls come in for a look around, but of course when it comes time to sleep in it tonight it will officially be declared, "Boys Only!"


Last but not least, summer just isn't summer without sweet, juicy, messy-as-can-be peaches!!! Yummmmmmmm!!!





So we officially declare our summer off to a great start!

Nothing Going On

This is a bit of a strange post to write, considering that we've had SO MUCH going on that I haven't even posted in awhile. Someday I hope to figure out the balance between living life and recording it. Both are important, yet can't very easily be done at the same time...

As I exercised this morning with my friend, Ginger, we shared some of our "mom feelings" about home life, specifically about family time. Of course Monday nights are SACRED; we count on having that. But there are other times that often need just as much priority, yet are very lacking in structure (at least at my house).

It may be that little while when the kids have just gotten home from school. Or it might be a Saturday morning when the calendar is actually blank. What defines these times isn't exactly clear, but as a mom I sometimes get a strong urge to lock my doors, unplug the phone, and simply "be together," for whatever amount of time it can last.

It might not even be that we actually gather for a meal, or gather at all. To a fly on the wall it would appear that there is "nothing going on." But in my eyes countless things are taking place.

In one corner of the couch two kids are talking about something that happened at school. Another child might be sitting quietly, working on homework. Another is scaling the kitchen in search of a snack, which he will then take to the table for a moment of much-needed "down time." (He'll likely be joined by at least one other soon.) On the floor a smaller one might play with blocks. Someone might go sit at the piano and play a song... And it's quite likely that, somewhere in there, at least one teaching moment will occur.

Of course the two on the couch might find something to argue about--but they'll work it out. The one doing homework might get distracted and off-task. The snacker(s) might come, begging and pleading, to ask for something not-so-healthy. And the blocks will be scattered across the room.

So what makes this time so important? Which of these activities could we absolutely not have lived without? Should this time be more "structured" and "productive"???

Well, no two days are exactly the same. Teaching moments occur spontaneously, and sometimes the lessons are simple: Relax. Sit for a bit. Enjoy each other.

As a mom these times are ones I soak up. When my kids are grown and gone I know I will have fond memories of these rare times when we had "nothing going on."

Something as simple as the TV being turned on, or a neighbor friend coming over to play, can change the whole dynamics--which makes these moments even fewer and farther between, and therefore even more cherished.

While these thoughts were on my mind I wanted to jot them down. Thanks to Ginger, I know there's at least one other mom who feels this way.

But I also need to get off the computer, since I'll soon have nothing going on. ;-)

Special Firsts

Spencer has recently experienced two new "Firsts" in his life, and it was extra-special that they both took place during trips to St. George, Utah. He turned twelve in December, so April 3rd was his first time attending the Priesthood Session of Conference. Since we were on a trip and therefore had only one car, we drove around the town until we found a church building where people were going inside. The girls and I (and Chase) dropped our men off and smiled as we watched the three of them walk in together. Spencer was so excited for his first General Priesthood meeting.

Sitting there in the parking lot I couldn't help noticing the colors in some of the trees. I don't ever remember seeing colors like this all together in the same tree before. I had to get a picture! Now tell me that doesn't look like General Conference!!! =)

The second "First" Spencer got to experience was doing Baptisms for the Dead in the St. George Temple. On April 29th we headed back up for Rob's Ironman, so the day before the race we took our three oldest into the baptistry to do some temple work. Spencer was beside himself with excitement!!!
Since our younger ones weren't old enough to go inside, Rob and I traded off: I went in with the older ones and did some confirmations while Rob walked around outside with the others; then he went in to perform the baptisms and I took the little ones to the Visitor's Center. We were reminded that this temple is the one in which the Founding Fathers appeared to Wilford Woodruff. I know that story is one reason this temple is one of my very favorites.

I hope Spencer will always remember these "Firsts," and the special feelings there.
Great memories!!!