Deftalently!!!

Chase is right on the verge of giving up one of my favorite words in his vocabulary: DEFTALENTLY. Last night he asked me how to say it (correctly) and we sat there, taking the word syllable-by-syllable, DEF - IN - ITE - LY, with him copying what I said. Even though it's fun to see the sense of accomplishment kids have at moments like this, a part of me was sad to say goodbye to this word I've loved. It's been so cute to hear his excitement, when I ask him a question and the answer comes back, "Deftalently!"

"Should we go buy some groceries?" "Deftalently!"

"Do you want to wear your glow-in-the-dark shirt?" "Deftalently!"

"Want me to take your picture on the warthog?" "Deftalently!"

Oh, why do little people have to grow up?!? =(

Windstorm

It's been storming a lot this week, and the kids have (mostly) loved the rain.
I was in the kitchen tonight and Blake came running in hysterically, half laughing, half in shock, jumping around, grabbing his face and yelling, "Oh my gosh!" over and over and over. It shocked me too, and I was trying to get out of him what all the Oh my goshing was about. But that was all he could say.
I followed him as he ran out to the back yard, and then found out what all the excitement was about. He and Spencer had been in the office and had just said, "Let's go out and jump on the trampoline," (they thought it would be fun in the windstorm--there was no lightning or anything...) when they looked out and saw the trampoline BLOW AWAY!

It blew all the way from the middle of our yard, over the fence and to the opposite side of the yard next to us. From there it went on to blow over the fence behind that lot.

I think I'm really glad the boys weren't on it when this happened... or would their weight have kept it on the ground???

Craziness!!!

Young Women's Medallion

Ashlee recently completed her Personal Progress program. This is the poster Sis. Erickson, our Personal Progress specialist, made for her. Bishop Bourgeous will present her with her medallion in church as soon as it arrives from Salt Lake. Way to go, Ashlee! We love you!!!

Goofy Girls!

Last night Kaybree (7) & Ashlee (16) were sitting on the couch together, doing homework. Ashlee started talking to herself as she worked her math problem, and Kaybree turned to her and said, "Do you know how hard it's getting to tell people that we're related?!?" Then they both almost fell off the couch laughing.

Just thought I'd share--I know, no pictures... boring. lame.

Sorry! =/

Amen!!!

I don't know the person who wrote this, but she's a friend of a friend of mine, so that's good enough, right?!? I tried to share some of my own thoughts on this topic, but then decided it only detracted from her wonderful way of putting it. So I will simply say, "Amen!" I love, love, love it! Enjoy!

http://arizonaromneys.blogspot.com/2009/05/making-most-of-our-time.html

Hiking & Life: A Brilliant Analogy (if I do say so myself!)

As we were hiking today, I realized some parallels between a good hike and a good life (Sorry, haven't added the pictures to go with it yet!):

*Sometimes looking back is worthwhile, but most of the time looking forward is more productive.
*Sometimes you'll encounter others who are simply out to finish first. Let them go by.
*Stopping to smell the flowers might cost you some time, but you'll be glad you didn't miss the experience!
*Sometimes you're the leader. Sometimes you're the follower. Both positions have great value.
*Holding someone's hand as you go makes the whole experience much better.
*Sometimes what you think is a shortcut really ends up costing you!
*But... sometimes a shortcut leads you to things you never would have seen otherwise.
*Be prepared for the journey.
*The best things in life can't be $$$purchased$$$.
*Just when the path starts to smooth out, you come around a corner and find a boulder.
*But... after you make it past the boulder, the path will often be smooth again.
*Sometimes what you learn by climbing the rocks teaches you more than you would have learned by going around.
*Challenge yourself. Push yourself. But also allow yourself to rest occasionally along the way.
And last, but not least:
*If you can't find a potty when you need one, NOTHING ELSE MATTERS!!!

Miracle on Oakley Drive

Well, this might not quite match the Miracle on 34th Street, but we had our own little Christmas miracle this year. About a week before Christmas (5 1/2 days, to be exact) we realized that Spencer's hamster, Rascal, was missing. (Rascal joined our family just after Christmas last year, so he's now very well-loved.) At one point while Blake and Spencer were searching, they even thought they had found him, dead--but when they got a flashlight and a better look, were relieved to find they were wrong. It was just a piece of cardboard. But... still, no Rascal. As the days continued going by, Spencer worried about Rascal surviving with no food or water.

Late on Christmas Eve (early Christmas Day by this time), while Rob, Ashlee, & I were still wrapping the last few presents, Rob came into the family room and stated to Ashlee & me, "VERY FUNNY! Whose idea was that?!?" We had no clue what he was talking about. He took us through the entryway, into the small bathroom, and showed us what he had discovered: Rascal in the trashcan!!! Alive!!!

We all had a good laugh as he recounted his moment of fear. He had been near the front door and suddenly heard a scuffling noise. He knew everyone was asleep except for the 3 of us, and he had just been with Ashlee and me in the other room. In an instant he was fully prepared to find an unwelcome guest and tackle him to the ground. He even acted out for us the exact way he tiptoed over to the bathroom door and then THREW it open, ready to pounce on whoever was in there! (Ashlee and I were rolling on the floor by this point!)

After the hilarity of it all wore off, we stood looking down into the trashcan, baffled. None of us could see any way he could have gotten in there! How could he have gotten IN, when it was obvious he couldn't get OUT?!? This trashcan is in the corner, with nothing around it. No counter, toilet, shelf, ... nothing that Rascal could have climbed onto and fallen in from. Granted, it's a small trashcan--12" high, maybe... but still... the same question went through our minds: How could he have gotten in, when he couldn't get out??? We could find no explanation.

So Rob put him in a bucket under the tree, and when we went in to open gifts Christmas morning, he told Spencer to go look in it. That moment was as fun as watching the kids open their gifts! He was so excited!!!

Just the night before, Rob had asked Spencer what he was doing to find Rascal. Spencer told him he was praying every day--plus obviously looking for him often. When Spencer looked into the bucket he yelled, "I KNEW IT!!!" Then he explained to us that when he went to bed Christmas Eve he told Heavenly Father that it would be really great if Rascal was back on Christmas Day; that would be a really, really nice Christmas present.

As we talked about the amazement of it all, none of us was able to explain how Rascal appeared in the trashcan. But Spencer had no question about how it happened. He said, "I guess Heavenly Father just picked him up and dropped him in!"

Friends

These three are just peas in a pod.  They play together at least weekly, and love (almost) every minute of it!  Lunch on the trampoline is tradition now, silliness included!  There's just nothing quite like lunch with good friends. =)

Randolph (Arizona Training Center)

No pictures with this post--and I'm changing names as well, for privacy reasons--but great memories we'll keep forever!
The youth from our stake were invited to go to the Arizona Training Center today, to spend time with the people who live there. They are severely disabled individuals, and some have been there since the 1950s when the Center opened. Since half of our family would be going, and the youth leaders had been told that younger family members were welcome, we decided to take the whole family.
After an orientation meeting, everyone headed out on the grounds to gather our Friends from their homes, and bring them to the gathering hall. It worked out that about 2 youth would be with one Friend.
We quickly came to realize that we were experiencing a great opportunity, a true privilege. Rather than blessing these people's lives by being there to help them, they were blessing our lives, simply by allowing us to spend time with them. As the director put it, "Today you will have the opportunity to make celestial friends."
Rob, Spencer, Emmee, Kaybree, Chase, & I were assigned to Marie, a woman probably in her 50's, with Downs Syndrome. She was in a wheelchair, which Spencer pushed from her home to the hall. They had told us that the Friends look forward to "Primary" all week, and it was obvious that Marie knew where we were going. Down the last sidewalk heading toward the building, she started moving her body forward and back, and making noise like a motor, letting us know that we needed to move faster. =) She also had a HUGE smile on her face in anticipation of what was to come.
When we got to the hall, Marie knew just where to go. She sits on the front row of the auditorium chairs, in the yellow section. She maneuvered from her wheelchair to one of the chairs, then proceeded to let Emmee and Kaybree know IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS that they would be sitting on either side of her. (She let them know by yanking their arms and pulling them into the chairs!) We all have to communicate right? =)
Marie is cross-eyed, has a prominent underbite, and doesn't hear well. Her favorite activities are those that involve loud noise, and especially noises that she can feel inside her ear canal. She loved it if we banged on the chairs, clapped loudly right next to her ear (and she favored her left ear), or made loud blowing or growling sounds in her ear. At one point she took my hand and banged my rings against the metal fasteners on the chair. My hand was all red by the time I got it back from her. =) The kids thought it was fun when the volunteers told them that this was their chance to be ROWDY in Primary! For Maggie, the rowdier the better!
One of Marie's first "requests" after we got into the hall was for Emmee to make a loud "UUUUUUUOOOHHHHHHH" sound in her ear. She made her wishes known by making the sound herself, then turning her ear toward Emmee. At first Emmee wasn't sure what to do, but we helped her figure it out and then she complied. As we were all still becoming accustomed to Marie's wishes, this was especially hilarious. Emmee was definitely out of her comfort zone, her eyes glancing all around to see who might be staring at her as she made this funny, LOUD growling/groaning sound! But Marie was THRILLED, and we all knew that was all that mattered. =) Of course by the end we were all doing crazy, loud things for her, without a thought of who was watching or what they thought. We had forgotten about ourselves by then; it was all about Marie.
We had also been told beforehand that Marie doesn't like to have anyone sit next to her. She always wants the chairs on either side of her empty, so she can hit them and make noise. She also doesn't like males, and makes them sit at least two chairs away. But for some reason she changed the rules for us. Even Spencer was allowed to sit by her for a few minutes!
Marie had a cute way of letting people know when she was finished with them. After Spencer had been sitting by her for awhile, she suddenly pushed on his back, then when he stood up she pushed his bum in the direction she wanted him to go. Then she replaced him with Kaybree by pulling on Kaybree's arm and plopping her into the chair. (She also called Lane Bourgeous over and "requested" that he blow and make loud noises in her ear--and then she promptly sent him away when she was finished with him. She's probably the only person who's ever been able to push Lane around!) ;)
Marie wasn't the only CELESTIAL FRIEND we got to make that day. Sally fell in love with Chase--repeatedly. Sally is one of the "old-timers" at the Center. She has "raised" just about everyone else there. She wanders around with her walker, checking on everyone throughout the hall. Each time she would pass by us, she would hurry (as quickly as she could) over to Chase and mumble, "Da baby?" Even though it was hard to understand her, she always wanted to know his age and who he belonged to. One time she said, "Boo!" to him, and he laughed. Then the next time she came around we told him to say, "Boo!" to her. When he did it she thought that was so funny!
One man who was walking around came up to Rob and grabbed his nose--pretty hard. Rob was looking another direction when the man approached him, so it especially caught him off guard. I would have loved to have a picture of that!
Just a few chairs over from us and all our racket was a quieter, calmer woman with long, gray hair. She was probably at least 80 years old, and she quietly held a life-size doll in her arms. We were told by the workers that this woman truly believes she is a mother, and she loves and nurtures her dolls just like a mother nurtures her children. As I watched her hug and rock her doll, I couldn't help thinking of all the mothers in the world who fail to find joy in motherhood, and yet here is this woman who would give anything to be a mother. I am so grateful for the knowledge I have that lets me know that this wonderful woman will have the opportunity, throughout eternity, to put her deepest desires into action, as a true mother. I believe her rewards will be far greater than even the greatest rewards she could have experienced in this life.
There was also a woman who loved to yell out her excitement. She was so, so happy--about everything! And she called quite a few people "Martha." She would spot someone across the hall and rush over to them, screaming her excitement as she went, and hug them. Often her next phrase would be, "What happened?!?" as if they had not visited in awhile--but not in an angry way at all; simply letting them know she missed them (even if it had only been a few minutes since she last saw them). =) Watching her, the thought occurred to me that if "men are that they might have joy," then she is way ahead of the game! I'm sure she has been joyful her entire life, unlike the rest of us who have had to fumble and stumble our way around for awhile before realizing that finding joy is a choice.
The volunteers explained to us that the program is the same every Sunday: Songs are sung in the same order, the residents sit in the same places, etc. Structure is very important, and the residents trust that everything will be just as they expect. The volunteers told us that there are several people there who are completely nonverbal. They can't sing the songs or participate like some of the others can, but they listen and they recognize the familiar songs sung week after week. The last two songs of the program are, "My Heavenly Father Loves Me" and "I Am a Child of God." There are three nonverbal individuals who cry each Sunday as they hear "My Heavenly Father Loves Me," because they know that means Primary is about to end.
I realized again today something I've learned before: That the people we often see as being "disadvantaged" in one way or another are often, in fact, the ones who actually have huge advantages over the rest of us. It's the mentally disabled individuals who are usually carefree and happy about everything; they love everyone; they see each day as an opportunity to find excitement in whatever comes along. The physically disabled often decide early-on that life will be as good as they make it--unlike the rest of us who are constantly distracted by our aims for perfection of one kind or another, repeatedly disappointed that we can't "have it all."
Today was a perfect way to set the tone for this Holiday season. It had nothing to do with present-wrapping, or rushing around to store after store, or the big man in the red suit. It had to do with those things that Christmas is really all about: It had to do with love, joy, and service. I truly pray for the day when Christmas can remain that simple.

At This Time of Thanksgiving

As I've thought about the many things I'm thankful for, and with Christmas right around the corner, I want to thank my parents for one of the greatest gifts they gave me--a gift they gave me by what they DIDN'T give me.
Growing up, we didn't have an excess of money. We always had what we needed, and much of what we wanted; I don't remember ever feeling like anything was missing. But we didn't ever spend a lot on clothes, home decor, nice cars, etc. We bought what was necessary, and enjoyed some "fun" things (on a small scale--like going out for ice cream) once-in-awhile.
As a parent now, I realize what a challenge it is to raise children in this world where entertainment and indulgence of every kind is but a credit card swipe away. It can be so tempting to buy every toy, every vacation, every happy meal, every this and that for our little ones; and often we're made to feel that if our children don't have these things, it's because we don't love them enough to properly "provide" for them. It is much easier to indulge ourselves and our children, than it is to exercise restraint. Truly loving our children requires us to hold back.
I was recently trying to find a favorite Conference talk that addressed this issue--but, sadly, I don't know who the speaker was. In my search, however, I still found a couple of quotes I like:
In 2001, Carol B. Thomas stated that, "We must avoid saturating our children with material things. We may deprive a child of enjoyment when we give him too much." Isn't it interesting that the world would have us believe that we're depriving our children by what we don't give them, when in reality we run the risk of depriving them of true joy by what we do give them.
I have a good friend whose husband has been out of work for almost a year. Their Christmas this year will be very small. They've always lived on a tight budget, and she told me about another small Christmas they had: She said she was worried, as she knew of other families who lived around them who would be enjoying new quads, new video game systems, etc. on Christmas morning, and she wasn't sure how her kids were going to feel when they saw what all their friends had gotten. When Christmas morning came, they opened presents and enjoyed some family time, then went outside to play with their neighborhood friends. After checking out their friends' new things, her kids ran back home and said, "This is the best Christmas EVER!!!" Seeing everyone else's STUFF hadn't phased them at all. They were grateful for what they had received, and never seemed to feel that anything was unfair. This quote by Richard G. Scott perfectly sums up the example that was set by these sweet kids: "Children teach us how to find joy even under the most challenging circumstances. Children haven't yet learned to be depressed by concentrating on the things they don't have."
As I think about my Christmas experiences as a child, I remember two gifts: One was a little blue Stomper volkswagen that was in my stocking; the other was the game "Operation," that I had been wanting for MONTHS--maybe years. My parents kept Christmas very simple, and I will be forever indebted to them for that.
As a mom now, I want more than anything for my own children to find joy in everyday life. I don't want them to live life constantly in search of the next exciting purchase or the next new upgrade; only to be left, time after time, feeling empty. I pray that they will find joy in nature, uplifting music, good literature, and most of all, truth. I hope that they will find satisfaction in activities like hiking, playing simple games, chatting with loved ones, accomplishing goals...
I'm so grateful for parents who taught me to find joy in simple things, and I hope I can manage to pass this wonderful gift on to my children.

THANK YOU, MOM & DAD! I LOVE YOU!!!

A Good Read

I recently finished reading the book Fahrenheit 451, the "Queen Creek Read" for Sept./Oct. Very thought-provoking. Just thought I'd pass along my recommendation, in case anyone's looking for a good book. It's by Ray Bradbury, and you can find it in the science-fiction section. (Yes, science fiction!!!) If I hadn't already been reading it before I realized it was sci-fi, I'm sure I never would have given it a chance. So glad I didn't know beforehand!!! ;-) I'd love to quote some parts here, but I won't... Anyway, GREAT BOOK!!!

I'm Gonna Miss This

Last night at bedtime Chase was restless, and since Rob was out in the garage and not coming in right away I decided to bring the little guy into bed with me for the time being. As I've learned to do with all our kids, I laid by him with my eyes closed, so as not to make it a playtime. It wasn't a punishment either; just time to be calm. He was still squirming, turning this way and that, trying to get comfortable. When he finally got comfy, with the covers just right, and seemed to be settled, I laid there taking in all his little actions, and decided I really should write this down. He's my baby, and I'll soon forget the details of what it was like during these years of having little ones so often next to me in bed--these years that, I have to admit sadly, I've sometimes looked forward to having be over with; these years of waking up with an aching shoulder from sleeping with my arm straight up, out of the way, because a little person was right up close to me all night...

First I began to feel light, ever-so-gentle pokes of a little finger on my cheeks and forehead, then eyelids. He really wasn't trying to wake me--and I wasn't asleep anyway; his fingers just needed a little something to do while his body started to relax. Then I felt a little arm reach around my neck, and a couple little fingers began feeling the bones on the back of my neck. Soon the other arm followed, but around the other side, so it had to make its way between the pillow and my neck, which took a little work for him. (I still stayed "asleep," knowing that all of this was part of his process of winding down. I knew if I laughed or talked to him it would just complicate the ritual.)

While his arms were around my neck, his little face was, of course, just a couple inches from mine. It was so hard not to peek at him as I laid there wondering what he might be looking at or thinking about. His little fingers kept quietly studying the top of my spine. I could feel his little breaths on my face, and here and there he would quietly mumble a word or two. I'm sure his mind was going over and over the day's events, and his thoughts sometimes came out in words. Nothing I could make any sense of; no complete thoughts, just little half-words.

Then a big yawn with a little sigh on the end. Then slowly the arms came out from behind my neck and were folded up softly by his head.

A few seconds later I felt a little foot squirm its way between my thigh and the bed. I felt a slightly scratchy little toenail--it really has been awhile since I trimmed them... :( Then the foot got pulled back out, and then put back again at a slightly different angle. Much better. Or maybe not... The foot got pulled out yet again, and turned slightly for a third try. Finally he pulled it out again and decided its final resting place needed to be between my thighs. And there it stayed.

My sweet little cuddle-buddy, joining me just until my Big Cuddle-Buddy came to bed. As much as I've looked forward to consistently having just two of us in the bed, I have to admit that I REALLY AM GONNA MISS THIS.

More Random...

...And, while I'm on the topic of RANDOM, I had a funny memory come to me recently, and thought just for the heck of it I'd post it. So I guess here's as good as anywhere...
Blake and Spencer have spent their whole lives being told how much they look alike. When they were little, strangers always asked if they were twins, or commented about how much they looked alike. They still get comments even now.
One day when Spencer was about 4 he asked me, "Mom, how did you figure out that me and Blake weren't twins?"
I can't even type this story now--all these years later--without laughing all over again! (And, yes, feeling stupid, since I'm sitting here by myself at the computer!) Anyway, thank goodness we have kids to keep the humor alive!!! ;-)
And... excuse me for being so RANDOM!

~~FYI, this picture was taken on a Fathers & Sons Outing in 2004. I was looking for a picture I could post with Blake & Spencer in it together--and this was the first one I came across. I'm sad that the blogging world didn't exist back then (did it??? Well, at least not in my life...)--so I'm going to occasionally throw some of our family's past on here--RANDOMLY!!! ;-)

Random...

My Kaybree girl cracks me up!!! Her most recent new word is RANDOM. Quite often, her statements will start off with, "Okay, this is really random, but..." so then I'm laughing before she even tells me what it is she wants to say! She's WAY too young for a lot of the phrases--and facial expressions--she comes up with... but I've learned that's a part of having teenage siblings. She's definitely 7 going on 15!

The Day Has Come... Again

Well, another sad day has arrived. This morning as I was writing the daily lunch notes (okay, maybe not always daily... but I try!), Spencer let me know that it would be okay with him if I didn't put one in his lunch. He was sweet about it. He let me down easy. It was obvious that he was hesitant to tell me what was on his mind. He simply said, "You don't have to put a note in mine." Then he added, "Sometimes it's kind-of embarrassing."

To be honest, I've been expecting this to happen anytime now--after all, this ain't my first rodeo!!! I've been through this twice before. Sometimes it happens when you're driving them to school and realize they're trying really hard not to be seen with you. Sometimes it happens when they don't want a kiss anymore--just a hug will do (and they'd really prefer to skip the hug as well). Sometimes they decide they're too old to listen to bedtime stories (which, by the way, is not allowed in my home--there is NO SUCH THING as being too old to be read to!!!). I think for most kids it's all of the above--just in different orders.

Sometimes I feel a little bit bad as I go on doing things (like lunch notes) that I'm pretty sure they no longer want. But I wait for them to bring it up. I would never want to suggest to them that they're outgrowing these things, just in case they really do still like them. I don't know what will be next on Spencer's list--I'm pretty sure he's not interested in having me come eat lunch with him at school anymore... Sixth grade is a pretty significant turning point.

I'm grateful that, so-far, they've all been kind about it. I think they might be too afraid to say it like it is, for fear that I'll get sad & mushy on them. And I'm actually arriving at the point of starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel! It seems that at some point it comes full-circle, and suddenly they like you again! In fact, I'm going on a field trip with Ashlee tomorrow! IN FRONT OF HER FRIENDS!!! Who'da thunkit???